đ Hello! This is Suzan. I write about organizational leadership and interview leaders from tech companies like Etsy, Github, Google, Netflix, and Spotify who share their insights on how they overcame a challenge. Thank you for being a part of this community. I love hearing from you!
Iâve talked a lot about the neutral zone â the time between an ending and a new beginning. Today I want to talk about what precedes it â an ending.
Gallup says that having a best friend at work makes you more engaged and look forward to work. Over the years, Iâve had many including Nina who Iâve worked with three times â twice by coincidence and once on purpose. I was lucky to meet Nina early in my career after we were both part of a layoff. Our work paths diverged but weâve remained close. We still confide to each other about about work, turning to each other for advice, to generate fresh ideas, to celebrate triumphs, and to work through frustrations.
Nina has been in senior executive roles for the past 15 years. Like all senior leadership roles, Ninaâs latest one means navigating organizational friction while guiding the team to meet company goals. Like many, the company has gone through a fair amount of change in the past few years. Nina felt immensely responsible for the teamâs well-being.
Nina confided to me that sheâd be leaving her job in a few weeks. An org restructure meant her role no longer existed. As we talked, I watched the leaves fall from the tree outside and snuggled up with my cup of tea.
âHow do you want to spend the rest of your time in your role?â I asked.
There were a few deliverables to wrap up but Nina was mostly concerned about the team. âIâm submitting promotion paperwork, writing performance evaluations, and pushing through overdue pay raises. Iâm trying to do everything I can to set them up for success. Iâm worried about what will happen to them when Iâm gone. I want to make sure theyâll be ok.â
âIt sounds like youâve done everything you can logistically. Your role is ending, you will no longer be able to ensure their well-being. Itâs time to let go of being their guide and protector.â I replied.
Nina was quiet. âYouâre right.â
âHow can you help them make the emotional transition to a work world that doesnât include you?â
This caught Nina by surprise.
âHmm. IâŠdonât know. I need to think about the emotions they might be having. I want to make this transition as easy as possible for them. I donât know what that looks like.âÂ
For the next hour, we talked about how they wanted to spend their last weeks. We pondered how Nina might build in space for the team to process their emotions. We mulled over the rituals that might help the team mark the ending. Finally, I urged Nina to take some quiet time to reflect on how she might begin letting go of the role as a guide for the team.
Nina left our conversation ready to make space for the ending and the beginning of a transition for the team.
******
What we call the beginning is often the end
And to make an end is to make a new beginning.
The end is where we start from.Â
â T.S. Eliot
Everything ends.
Nothing lasts forever except maybe plastic. Unlike plastic, the half-life of organizations is much shorter. True homeostasis is rare. Shifts happen as people leave, as new clients come in, and as the entity evolves. Then there are the seismic changes: restructures, layoffs, and new policies changing how we operate or how we pay people. For my friendâs team, it was the departure of a beloved senior leader theyâd known as a staunch advocate.
That Slack message, All Hands meeting, or email announcing changes heralds an ending. It signals that something different is about to happen. Things will no longer be the same as they were.
The news might come as a surprise. The team doesnât have the same context we do as leaders whoâve been planning the change. They havenât had time to grapple with what it means for who they work with, their role, and how they operate. Weâve written an ending they might not have expected.
Deciding on the change is just the first step. As transition expert William Bridges reminds us, âEndings are the first, not the last, act of the play.â
Endings are full of logistics, theyâre also full of emotions. Loss and grief are prominent features of endings though we donât often talk about this in work contexts. In my experience, we tend to focus on the planning part of the endings, leaving little attention to the emotional journey of the team.
Many of us find goodbyes tricky. Me too. This means weâre likely to skip over the ending to get through the discomfort faster. Itâs tempting to say, the past is the past. Itâs time to move on. We think it will help. It doesnât.
Endings bring loss. To move forward, the team must accept the loss and let go. Lurking emotions put a fresh start at risk. As leaders, we must acknowledge and make space for this process. Some will let go fast, others will take time. This is normal. Letting go is hard for most of us.
Leaders must be sense makers. During times of change, we act as guides. We help the team sort out whatâs ending, whatâs beginning, and whatâs unclear. Certainty with change is rare. There are always things we donât expect or donât know. Acknowledging it with the team builds trust.
The best of us are also experience designers, especially during transition periods. These leaders recognize that emotions are a natural reaction to change and uncertainty. They know the team needs to make sense of whatâs happened and find a new way forward. They know this takes time. When organizational leaders acknowledge loss and allow people time to process it, they create a space where emotions and work can co-exist. They normalize emotions, creating a fertile ground for that new beginning to sprout.
Are you a leader looking for support during organizational change? Iâve just opened a spot in my coaching practice. Learn more.
âLeaders must be sense makers.â That makes so much sense Suzan. And if the leaders have to help their people with sense-making and transitioning while dealing with loss, they have to be able to handle it themselves. Beautiful essay!